Women Loving Life Worldwide

The Glass Block Story: Patience Pays Off

Renae Pelo — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 19:34:50 +0000

by Anne Alexander

I don’t know about you, but patience is not my strong suit. In most situations, I want to move forward in action. A few weekends ago I had an amazing experience that powerfully drove home to me, once again, the value of patience, especially when it comes to finding creative and effective solutions to our problems.

The beautiful wood lot next door to our house was recently cleared to put up two more homes. We knew it was going to happen sooner or later. On the window that faces the lot, we had a beautiful stained glass piece, however, the window showed through about 8” on either side.

Now, with the lot cleared, every time I went by the window, instead of beautiful greenery, I noticed raw earth, scraped by the bulldozer. It made me cringe every time. I am a big believer in the tremendous benefit of setting up our environment to support us. This includes all kinds of environments, like clients, friends, beliefs, food, etc. But in this case it was my physical/ social environment.

We had to do something to change that view out the window. I came up with the idea of a lightweight translucent plastic roller shade that would go behind the stained glass. Definitely tacky, but I was adamant I did not want to see construction for the next six months or look into someone else’s window for years after that.

Although this idea wasn’t the greatest, I didn’t see any other option and my perspective, as an impatient, action-oriented person was “Let’s just put up the shade.”

Fellow “action” friends take note: sometimes action can be premature.

So what happened? We started tossing ideas around – an attractive Japanese paper shade of some kind, plastic film you stick on windows in bathrooms for privacy that still lets light through, even spray-on coatings.

Yet, we agreed, none were very aesthetically pleasing in our desire to create an uplifting, beautiful environment that would positively affect our daily performance and happiness.

To stimulate our idea process, we went to the local home improvement monster box store and cruised the aisles, trying to come up with a good solution. No luck.

Finally, frustrated and back home again, I noticed the glass block I had in my office. It simply sat on my window sill since I had nowhere to install it, but I had loved it for years. Was there some way to use the block?

We quickly discovered that the spacing was almost perfect – one column of glass block on either side would fill the gaps perfectly. The wave pattern made it so, while light came through, we didn’t really see what was outside, just some color.

Now we wondered how we would stack a column of blocks, without mortar. It turns out they make a plastic insert for just that purpose – dry-stacking glass blocks.

We bought some blocks and inserts and you would think that the window had been specifically planned for this purpose. I was amazed! The solution was perfect. Yet, in my initial rush to solve the problem, I would never have come up with this.

It was a wonderful lesson to me to:

1) take enough time to come up with the best solution, and

2) put your head together with one or more others to guarantee better solutions.

In this action-oriented culture, there isn’t much value placed on patience. Let us be wise and not make that mistake.

Anne Alexander is a small business growth “architect,” providing coaching and consulting to entrepreneurs with zero to ten employees. You can download Anne’s free 49 page report, 3 Market Domination Strategies That Will Dramatically Multiply Your Sales & Profits, at Small Business Coaching Report.

Anne Alexander may be contacted at http://www.authentic-alternatives.com

Fighting Fatigue

Renae Pelo — Thu, 28 Jan 2010 17:48:56 +0000

by Charlotte Gerber

Every new mom and even those with active toddlers can understand the battle with fatigue. I remember when I had my first child and I didn’t sleep for a year. Well, maybe I slept every once in a while but I felt like a zombie most of the time. As a result I found out a few ways to help me come out ahead in my fight against fatigue.

The first thing that you should do when you continually feel exhausted is to see your primary care physician. It is surprising that many women don’t seek help even when they are completely worn out to the point of exhaustion. Many new moms are told that it is normal to feel tired when you have a new baby. It is not normal, however, to feel exhausted every day, all day. Many health problems mimic general fatigue including depression, thyroid disease, Lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. Although some of these health issues are uncommon, your physician can run a blood test to help eliminate these as the cause of your fatigue. All of these health problems are treatable but you have to make the first step towards helping yourself.

Ask your family for help with your children. It may be difficult to ask others to help you out but it can be a lifesaver, literally. If you have been pushed to the point of exhaustion and you find yourself yelling or being very irritable, ask for help. Many unfortunate incidents where children have been injured could have been avoided if the mother had asked for assistance when she was feeling over-taxed. Single moms can find help if they don’t have family members to rely on by contacting family agencies in their area. Community centers are a great place to look for assistance; many can even recommend reliable babysitters in your area.

Exercise can play an important part in your daily routine and general health. It may seem improbable but exercise can actually give you more energy. If you already are following a healthy diet plan, adding exercise to your routine may help you sleep better. Exercise can also reduce your stress level and eliminate those tension headaches that are common when you have little ones. An easy way to exercise is to take your child for a walk in the stroller or ride your bike with your toddler on board. Swimming is also an excellent way to exercise and many swim centers offer classes for babies as well as older children. Children always love picnics so pack up a lunch and walk on over to your local park for some fun in the sun.

Remember to put your health first when you are caring for small children. It is no fun for the mom or the child when they are tired and irritable all of the time. Eat well, get plenty of rest and remember to ask for help when you need it. Your children will thank you for it, even if they only say it with a gurgle or a burp!

Charlotte Gerber is a writer, researcher, photographer and is a familiar voice on ipods with her voice over talents. She writes on a variety of topics including parenting, self-help and travel. Her photographs have appeared in many ezines and regional travel magazines. Charlotte has a B.S. in Community and Human Services from SUNY Empire State College.

Charlotte Gerber may be contacted at http://www.charlottegerber.com or gerberink@earthlink.net

Your Greatness is Unique

Renae Pelo — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 02:20:30 +0000

by Joyce Shafer, L.E.C. and Author

Your greatness is unique and reveals itself at the right time. You might as well be excellent until you’re great. But first, understand what this means.

What your greatness is will be unique, so it’s a waste of time and energy to compare yourself to others. What your greatness is may appear small; but to those it matters to (especially you), it’s anything but small or insignificant. Are the entertaining books of an author such as Janet Evanovich less great than the work of a heart surgeon? No; just different. I can tell you that the many episodes of toes-up laughter I experienced when I read her novel, “Plum Lovin’,” did my heart, mind, and mood tremendous benefit. I’m grateful she discovered and lives her greatness in a way that lets me benefit from it.

Do you have a green thumb that produces fruits, vegetables, or flowers that nurture others in a meaningful way for them? Do you have a gift for encouraging young children’s minds and self-esteem? Are you a frustrated Thomas Edison type? A great quote of his is, “I had to succeed because I finally ran out of things that wouldn’t work.” That’s passionate commitment! One thing is certain: Whatever greatness is, it always leads by example. There are numerous levels of examples, including the simple art of how to enjoy life (which so many struggle with) even if you never perform a heart transplant or write a best-seller.

Maybe you haven’t identified what you’re great at yet. It’s the thing you love most to do or feel most alive or fulfilled when you do it, no matter what form it takes in the world. And as with anything, you start at the beginning and expand, enhance, develop, and grow into your greatness. You don’t start at the end result.

Greatness, though, is not only about what you do, it’s about who you are at your core of being. Do you seek to learn about and understand yourself and others? Do you deliberately nurture self-love and, therefore, love of others? Are you kind, compassionate, empathetic, friendly, of service in ways appropriate for you? Are you self-assessing and self-adjusting?

Until you get clear or in alignment with your inner and outer greatness, be excellent; and please, avoid perfectionism (I have never met an easy-going perfectionist). Release the definition of excellence used by others and aim for your personal best. Your personal best will be different from day to day. But you can ask yourself, “What would my best look like right now?” and “Do I feel I did the best I could at the time?”

Greatness appears early for some and later in life for others. There are individuals who amass experiences or overcome challenges until the day arrives when they are clear about what their greatness is: that which they have head-and-heart alignment about and a passionate commitment for.

If you feel you’re not living your greatness at this time, ask: Am I building my skills so that I’ll be ready when it’s time? Do I know what I really want to do but hesitate because of what others might think? Am I waiting until it’s too painful not to do it?

Until you know what your greatness is, or choose it, explore what excellence means for you. You won’t be bored.

Joyce Shafer, LEC (jls1422@yahoo.com) is an author and creator of the Reinvent Yourself life and business coaching program for new and struggling Law of Attraction users. Make Shift Happen! Design your life. Visit http://www.freewebs.com/coach4lifebalance (free empowerment tools and newsletter). Her books and e-books are available at www.lulu.com and discounted at her Web Store.

Joyce Shafer, L.E.C. and Author may be contacted at http://www.freewebs.com/coach4lifebalance or jls1422@yahoo.com

Discover Your Mission and Your Message

Marnie Pehrson — Thu, 28 May 2009 16:23:30 +0000

The following is an audio from a workshop designed to help you discover your strengths, talents and purpose in life. It was held by Marnie Pehrson of MonetizeYourGifts.com

First, download the Message Assessment Worksheet

Then Listen to the Audio

MP3 File

Perceptions: The Parable of the Tinted Glasses

Marnie Pehrson — Thu, 28 May 2009 16:10:25 +0000

Imagine with me for a moment that you are standing amidst a group of people who are observing a sunset. Before you is a beautiful landscape — a lush valley with assorted trees in bloom and a mountain range. The sun is setting in a sweeping display behind the mountain range and all these people have gathered to watch it.

Each of the people in the crowd is wearing glasses. Some glasses are tinted red, others blue, red, yellow, grey or black. The people begin to comment about the sunset. One person says, “Don’t you just love that red sunset?”

His companion wearing blue-tinted glasses answers, “It’s not red, it’s blue.”

“No, it’s not!” says the first. “It’s clearly red. Look at all those beautiful shades of red.”

“Both of you are wrong,” sneers another. “It’s a bright yellow, almost like noon day.”

“Yellow? Where in the world do you get yellow out of that?” cries a woman wearing green glasses.

Before long, the people have clumped into groups based on the color of their glasses. They start pointing at the other groups, “Those people over there think the sunset is blue. They are such liars. It’s clearly red!”

“Now, they aren’t lying,” soothes the green group. “They just aren’t seeing all of the green. Blue is very close to green, you see. So they aren’t lying, they’re just not seeing the full effect. The real liars are those people over there who say it’s all dark and black!”

“No,” cries the yellow group. “You’re all wrong. It’s a sunny day. You’re all crazy. As for those poor people seeing it dark and black, well they are just blind. We should feel sorry for them.”

So the debate continues. Finally, the sunset is over and they each return to their homes. A man named Bob (wearing yellow-tinted glasses) slips into bed beside his wife Lori (who wears blue-tinted glasses). Bob describes the sunset to Lori and the next day she passes along the information to a friend named Mary. As she describes the yellow-tinted sunset through her blue-lens perspective, Mary assumes the sunset was green (blue plus yellow makes green). In fact, it’s very green because Mary happens to wear green glasses.

Mary then passes along to Sue that the sunset last night was green. Sue says, “Oh, no it wasn’t! It was yellow!”

“No, it was green,” Mary retorts. “Bob was there and he said it was green. Lori told me. It was clearly green.”

“You’re lying! Bob said it was yellow last night!” exclaims Sue.

“Well, Bob must be a two-faced liar,” Mary exclaims.

Thus, it continues, Mary and Sue get so mad at each other they won’t have anything to do with each other anymore. In fact, the whole town is in an uproar because each person sides with one group or another and calls the others duped, mistaken or downright liars.

Who’s telling the truth? None of them. Yet none of them is lying either. In reality, God created the sunset with subtle purples, violets, blues, reds, yellows, oranges, and shafts of white light. God placed all the colors of the rainbow in the sunset for the crowd’s enjoyment.

Yet, they could only see what their lenses allowed them. None was lying. They all saw what they said they saw. They all believed it to be the way they perceived it. However, these perceptions were only relative truth — tainted by the tint of their individual lenses.

This story reminds me of Jesus’ admonition, “Judge not that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why beholdest thou the mote (splinter) that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam (two-by-four) that is in thine own eye? Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:1-5)

In other words, don’t judge people who wear yellow glasses because you’re probably wearing another color yourself! First, take off your glasses before you start judging others or even before helping them see the sunset. Personally, I believe we’re all wearing one color of glasses or another. Sure, there are moments when we remove them to rub our eyes, and we catch a glimpse of truth. But, the only One who never wears tinted glasses is God.

That’s why Paul advised, “Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves . . . for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.” (Rom. 12:19) What right do we (who are flawed) have to seek retaliation upon another?

So the next time we hear someone describe an event or the next time we feel the urge to find fault or gossip, maybe we’ll remember this little parable and know that only God sees life without glasses. The rest of us are influenced by our life circumstances, upbringing, environment and attitude. If we can remember that, I think we’ll find fewer faults in others and the world will be a better place as a result.

Learn more about Marnie Pehrson and her work at Monetize Your Gifts.

Are You Willing to Do Whatever It Takes?

Renae Pelo — Wed, 27 May 2009 19:29:33 +0000

by Milana Leshinsky

This is a very common question when you have a conversation about success.

A coach or a motivational speaker says to you, “You must be willing to do whatever it takes if you want to become successful!”

Yes, I am willing to do whatever it takes . . . as long as I still love my life. Perhaps a single person without children could easily say yes to all of the things required of him or her. But when you’re a family person, all of that changes.

What I am not willing to do, for example, is to work harder than I have to, spend more than 30 hours a week on my business, travel more than once a month, stay up working late, have an alarm clock wake me up at 7 am, or have a client call me on a weekend.

You decide – what are YOU willing to do to become successful?

Most importantly, I am the living proof that you can build a million-dollar business WITHOUT sacrificing your personal happiness working less than 35 hours a week. You just need to focus on the right actions.

Milana is a multiple-income stream advisor to coaches, authors, consultants, entrepreneurs and experts, helping them build a high-income business, multiple streams of revenue, and a lifestyle business. Milana recently published an Amazon best-seller called “Coaching Millions.” Would love to reach more entrepreneurs, coaches and experts and who are tired of chasing clients and feeling frustrated about their businesses.

Milana Leshinsky may be contacted at http://www.milana.com/ or milana@milana.com

The Advantages of Home Schooling

Renae Pelo — Fri, 15 May 2009 20:14:29 +0000

by Lisa Rae Preston

One friend said to me, “I don’t know if I’d want to homeschool, because it wouldn’t leave me any time for ministry.”

After I quit twitching and biting my tongue, I started to ponder the real meaning of that statement.

While Paul says . . . some plant, some water, and some reap the harvest, our usual interpretation of ministry is one person preaching to a congregation and people going to the altar. I have been blessed a million times by that kind of ministry. But rarely has a person taken me by the hand and said, “I’m not letting go until we reach the next step. I am holding on to you. I believe in you, I will listen to you, and I will love you no matter what.” That’s powerful ministry. And you can’t do it to a hundred people!

What greater blessing to be able to give all of that listening, mentoring, loving, challenging, –holding the hand and never letting go– to our children. How devastating not to give them that. Time is so important. And if “all you do” is raise your children to be godly, to love Christ with all their hearts, souls, minds and strength, YOU have had an awesome ministry. What greater blessing for a mother than to have the time to gently instruct her children in the ways of God.

You can’t hurry that. True discipleship and commitment aren’t “convenient”. They’re processes that demand time and focus.

To be home, sharing God’s Word as our children rise, as they go about their day, as they go to bed at night — helping these precious, precious gifts store up God’s Word in their hearts and walk in the way that leads to freedom- What a ministry!

In the age of fast-this, convenience-that, we have become a society absent from community. We are a culture that doesn’t even recognize the benefits of spending lots of time with and nurturing our own children.

What a message of strength and hope that a parent would say, “You know, I want my children with me. I want them holding my hand along this journey of life –not their peers’ hands.”

The beauty of homeschooling is that it allows time for that commitment in a less-stressed, slower paced atmosphere. The awesome sense of connection we’ll have with our children will be worth any sacrifice we make.

And the blessings will last an eternity.

Lisa Preston taught public school for 17 years before becoming a Homeschool Evangelist! Pick up her free book Why You Should Homeschool Your Child: A Public Schoolteacher’s Confession at http://www.homeschoolhelper.com

Lisa Rae Preston may be contacted at http://www.lisaraepreston.com or lrpreston@msn.com

Parent Affirmations: Are Yours Too General?

Jean Tracy — Fri, 15 May 2009 20:09:52 +0000

by Jean Tracy, MSS

Are your affirmations too general? Would your child be better motivated by more detail? Would you like your child to feel valued? Learn how to create the best affirmations for motivating and valuing your child.

Imagine being a child. Your parents just attended your school play. You were the star. On the way home, your parents told you, “That was good.” Would you be satisfied? Would you probe for more? Would you feel let down?

Let’s say you hit a home run and it won the baseball game. On the way home your dad said, “Good game,” but nothing about your home run. Would “Good game” be enough?

Perhaps you rescued your friend, Billy, from drowning. Everyone paid attention to Billy. Finally, his mom looked at you and said, “Thanks.” Would you be pleased?

What do “That was good,” “Good Game,” and “Thanks” have in common? That’s right. They’re too general. What do they lack? Right again, they lack specificity.

Specificity describes a few particulars to affirm. The parents of the star actor could have specified with “You spoke loud, clear, and with great expression. Your gestures showed me what you were saying and your facial expressions fit your words and gestures. You were good.” Be honest, wouldn’t you rather hear this specific affirmation than “That was good”?

The parents of the home run hitter might have said, “When you smacked that ball, I knew it was a ‘homer.’ Your whole team cheered as you raced around the bases. I couldn’t stop screaming. You won the game today.” Is this a better and more specific affirmation than “Good game”?

The mother of your rescued friend could have said, “You acted bravely today. I’m proud of your quick reaction to Billy’s danger. You showed us all how courageous you are. Thank you so much for jumping in and saving Billy.” Would this specific affirmation be more satisfying than just, “Thanks”?

Notice the affirmations you give your child. If yours are too general, make them more specific. Increase your child’s desire to repeat positive behavior. Increase your child’s sense of feeling valued. You’ll be increasing your child’s self-esteem and you’ll be building character too.

Jean Tracy, MSS, publishes a Free Parenting Newsletter.
Subscribe at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.

Subscribe to Jean Tracy’s blog at http://parentingskillsblog.typepad.com and pick up a new tip with each post.

Jean Tracy, MSS may be contacted at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com

Christian Homeschooling Offers the Blessing of a Lifetime

Renae Pelo — Fri, 15 May 2009 20:03:54 +0000

by Lisa Rae Preston

There’s more to Christian home schooling than a high quality education. God calls us to lead our children into a heart-to-heart relationship with Himself.

Christian home schooling means your entire family steps off the television-driven cultural path and walks to the heartbeat of Christ. You’re bound to face criticism, as we are taught quite effectively to go along with the majority. Don’t let that deter you from this heavenly adventure! The narrow path contains more buried treasure than you could ever dig up! The easy road is wide – and barren.

Nurturing the relationship with your husband, modeling respect and honor, building strong communication skills – these processes take time and commitment. Your family may choose to opt out of the “got to be somewhere different every night of the week” mania and just relax together at home.

Preparing your child’s heart becomes paramount. Discipleship is life, not a unit study. Loving Jesus and following Him comes before the trivium, field trips, and hands-on activities.

Christian home schooling means letting God have control of your “school”, your curriculum choices, all your decisions. Most of us were schooled in the public arena, and when given control, can’t help but model our own educational experiences.

As you let Christ hold the steering wheel of your life, and you become a trusting passenger, He will lead you to the right curriculum for your children, the perfect way to incorporate Scripture into your lives, creative activities you wouldn’t have found elsewhere. He’s the most gifted Teacher, and He teaches us as we teach our children.

As your children come to know God as “Abba”, their hearts will become stronger; their confidence and faith, unshake-able. Having received both a mother’s and father’s blessing, your children will begin to understand the strength and tenderness of Christ. What price tag can be placed on this kind of foundation building? It’s worth more than gold and jewels.

I can imagine no greater adventure than following Him, hand in hand with the precious treasures He’s allowing us to parent. Christian home schooling is, indeed, the blessing of a lifetime.

Lisa Rae Preston may be contacted at http://www.lisaraepreston.com or lrpreston@msn.com

How Moral Dilemmas Turn Your Kids into Independent Thinkers

Jean Tracy — Fri, 15 May 2009 19:58:30 +0000

Do your children choose well when faced with moral dilemmas? Would you like to prepare them to make good choices? Find out how to teach them to make good decisions and build character too.

Recently my son, Brian, who is a young man now, asked, “Mom, remember how you always asked me when another kid was shamed, hurt, or bullied, ‘How would you feel if that happened to you?’”

“Yes. Why?” I asked.

“That really made me think,” he said. Parents, that’s exactly what you want your kids to do – think!

Listen. I know child rearing is difficult. I know the disappointment when your child makes poor choices, skips out on chores, or treats others badly.

During my years as a child counselor, I created ways for kids to think, discuss, and make ethical decisions. My goal was to help them become independent thinkers rather than crowd followers. Now you can help your kids become independent thinkers by discussing moral dilemmas. Moral dilemmas build these 3 qualities in kids:

Logical thinking
Respect toward others
Family values

Empathy, respect, and honesty can evolve from frequent dilemma discussions.

Consider discussing this moral dilemma with your kids:

You are supposed to be home by dark. It is almost dark. You and your friend are in the middle of an exciting video game. If you left right now, you’d barely get home in time. What will you do? Why?

Get your children to discuss this dilemma with you and with each other. Listen to their answers. Is their reasoning logical? Do they respect the parent’s guidance about coming home before dark? Are they developing family values? You’ll know whether your own code of ethics is sinking in. When kids discuss moral dilemmas, you help them grow into people of character.

Moral dilemmas should include:

Problems in school
Problems at home
Problems with friends

Create and discuss ethical dilemmas before real life problems happen. Get your kids to think about others’ feelings. Get them to think logically. Get them to think right about wrong.

One more thing, when your kids discuss moral dilemmas, they’ll be thinking bigger than themselves. They’ll be creating a code of ethics with solutions. Why not build character now? Use dilemma discussions today.

Want more parenting tips? Get 21 of the best FREE TIPS at http://www.KidDiscuss.com

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Treat your family to the DILEMMA DISCUSSION KIT at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com too.

Jean Tracy, MSS may be contacted at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com